Oh, you know.. We all have these wants, but patience is what we all need. Everything is in God’s plan; I have to keep reminding myself that. I don’t need things that can only satisfy me for a short amount of time.
Just know that what ever happens, happens for a reason. God has planned out your entire life. He knew us before we were even born. And to think about what Christ did for us, makes me feel so sinful.To think about people that I disappoint makes me feel bad, but I shouldn’t feel as bad as I am when I know God is disappointed in me, I should feel worse.
This summer has to be the best. It has to filled with fellowship. Growing in my faith with one another because, this will be the true testing of my faith.
I haven't been blogging about how I've been. So, here's an update.
I tell myself that I want to grow in my faith, but I never do anything about it.
So basically, I just feel far away from God. And, I want to become close with Him again. I want that everlasting happiness He gave me; that true satisfaction that is forever. I want to thank Him for every minute I’m alive and all the things He has blessed me with. I want to give up all the wordly things I love, just for Him; but it isn’t easy. I want to overcome sin. I want to pray; but my heart just won’t get into it.
All I want right now.. is to have fun. Live life; happily and freely. But, this life I have, it was all because of God. So now, I can’t stand how I just want life to be all about what I want to do, rather than what is right for God.
Ugh, and how I just feel disappointed in some friends. I hope you know who you are. Just know the reason why I care. Not only because you’re my friend, but because I care about how it hurts God, that I care about your relationship with God. And, if you were truly sorry, you wouldn’t want to do it again. And, that.. is my only ounce of hope I feel that I have with God. The fact that I still won’t give in to temptaion, because I know God is still there, just like He will always be.
4 comments:
I'm feeling this post, too.
i love you joanna
I'm so happy I got to see you for a little bit last night, I missed your face.
Seek the Lord and He will help you grow for His Glory.
Joanna, you're growing. If you look at the progression of your blog throughout the year, you'll find there is an increasing maturity to your posts, and I was somewhat taken aback by this post because it's that next step in maturity. You articulate the Christian struggle so well -- when we first believe, we're so filled with joy and true satisfaction, but as life continues we start to fall off track and long to get back to that spiritual high we used to have.
My advice to you is this: As you pray for God to increase your faith, cling to the remaining joy you have. It may not be as abundant as an other times in your life, but it's still God's grace and know that the joy that remains is still more than enough. Also, as you grow in truth and the knowledge of the word, continue to grow in love. I'm proud of the way you stand firm for truth yet remain soft in your approach to others. Continue to "consider how to stir [others] up to love and good works (Heb 10:24)," because you'll need endurance when it comes to talking to anyone about sin. If at first you don't succeed, try, try (and try and try) again. Love you Joanna, keep going and keep growing!
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